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nathalie lawrence

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The Rejection Project

So I have this thing called a flaw where I take rejection personally. The most common advice I see is to grow thicker skin and appreciate that every No gets you closer to a Yes. Alas, my skin is still as brittle as tissue paper. So I started a blog series to force me to process my literary rejections. Each post involves 1) acknowledging the rejection and 2) talking about something random as a distraction and palate cleanser. It’s like cleaning a cut before sticking a Spiderman band-aid on your knee. Turns out taking the time to process is more useful than keeping a stiff upper lip while dying inside.

Yes, I could scribble in my journal or rant to friends and family. I’ve tried, but hiding my emotions behind closed doors is damaging. My goal of this project is to make the pain of rejection a little more acceptable to feel in the writing world. Am I advocating writing furious screeds to agents, publishers, and reviewers? Absolutely not. The point is to acknowledge the hurt and move on. Some people can let rejection slide off their back. I am not one of those people, so here we are.

Mar
15

Rejection and Colin Firth

Another rejection last week. It was fine. However, I stumbled across an interview with a literary magazine editor that tripped me up. This was the editor’s advice to writers: Don’t take rejection personally. This way of thinking is as pervasive as it is outmoded. No, I don’t believe agents/publishers/magazines dislike me when they reject my…

Mar
04

Rejection and Medieval Animal Trials

I’ve been reading about medieval animal trials this week. As in, people used to bring in misbehaving animals to court and put them on trial for their crimes. My friend sent me an article about it at least six months ago, but I only now got around to reading it because I’m a horrid friend….

Feb
24

Rejection and the CIA

I got a rejection this morning but was too busy feeling groggy from too much melatonin to care. Physically, it felt like a sharp shove but then I remembered I had more important things to deal with today.  In any event, it’s probably time to tell you about my, uh, let’s say peculiar, family. Specifically,…

Feb
23

Rejection and Monsters

I got a rejection on Sunday while parked in some snow on a random side street in Chicago. Surprisingly enough, it was a positive rejection, and the editors encouraged me to submit again soon. Finally, I got a pitying shoulder squeeze instead of a punch to the face. God, what a relief.   I must…

Feb
22

Rejection and Q and Not U

I knew it was a rejection before I even knew it was a rejection. I don’t know why, but this particular magazine was bumping around in my thoughts all day on Friday. Nauseatingly hopeful bubbles formed in my head that morning as I thought about some of the pieces they’d published. Mine would fit in…

Feb
15

Rejection and K.I.D.S. Radio

I got a rejection at 4 A.M. on Saturday. I’m not taking it too, too personally, but I like to pretend the following is what happened: The editor read my piece on Friday night, and oooh, it sent them into a rage. They hated it. They hated it so much. But the other editors were…

Feb
10

Rejection and Sno-Mo

Got a rejection today, and it sent me into a mild rage. Pro tip: Don’t ask me to like your social media pages after you reject me. In case you, dear phantom reader, think I’m thin-skinned and whiny– oh wait, that’s actually true. Regardless, my point is that I am no stranger to rejection. At…

Feb
06

Rejection and French Cursive

Got a rejection yesterday. Made me roll my eyes, but it didn’t hurt. Progress, yes?  You know what’s weird, though? French handwriting. I grew up writing French cursive, and my teachers did their best to beat the classic rounded letters into my terrified fingers. Cursive was ridiculously important to them. Some twenty-ish years later, a…

Jan
29

Rejection and It’s Not Even Mine

The person with whom I share a marriage license wrote two short stories several years ago, and I think they’re awesome. I’m not saying this as a starry-eyed wifey because I assure you, I’ve hated some of his other work and have no problem bleeding comments all over his pages. These stories are awesome because…

Jan
21

Rejection and Sean Penn

I realized the other day I was down to two pending submissions and fast approaching the “assuming the lack of response is a rejection” dates for both. I’m starting to enjoy the rejection as a catalyst for blogging (something I usually hate but that the industry assures me is essential), so I sent out another…

Jan
17

Rejection and Mayo

I got a rejection Friday afternoon. A form rejection, nothing fancy. But still, the timing. The Likely Intent: Damn, I need to make some progress with the slush pile so let’s send this out. The Messaging: Hahahaha I hope you have a terrible weekend, bitch. I realize there’s never an ideal time for rejection, but…

Jan
13

Rejection with a Side of Salad

I got another rejection first thing yesterday morning because I continue to be a sucker who checks her e-mail right after opening her eyes. The editor didn’t connect with the characters. I’m not someone who blatantly rejects criticism and thinks my writing is flawless. I also understand that sometimes a reader just doesn’t click with…

Dec
07

Rejection and a TWSBI Fountain Pen Review

Productivity blogs are on to something: Don’t check your e-mail first thing in the morning. I do this out of habit because the blue light forces my eyes to actually open, but this leaves you in an open minefield because I literally woke up to a rejection today. I’ll probably keep doing the morning e-mail…

Nov
19

Rejection and Cheetahs

I got a rejection today, so my best friend Edith (not her real name), who is an Egyptologist (not her real profession), made the requisite offer to beat the shit out of my rejector. I thanked her for the thought but declined because I’m not a psycho and it would require a lot of effort…


Featured image by Siora Photography on Unsplash

RECENT POSTS

  • My First Acceptance
  • Rejection and Colin Firth
  • Rejection and Medieval Animal Trials
  • Rejection and the CIA
  • Rejection and Monsters

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  • memoir
  • processing
  • redactions
  • rejections
  • unsolicited advice

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